Kayak Blaggers Guide

(inspiration taken from Richmond Canoe Club)

Blagging, know your boats & equipment

  • K1 = 1 person Kayak
  • K2 = 2 Person Kayak
  • K3 = 3 person (tho very rare)
  • K4 = 4 person kayak…..
  • K5 = K4 + two juniors wedged in at number 4
  • Wings = paddles
  • Flats = ironed wings
  • Regina,Whisper, Stilleto = Racing K2s
  • Jag = Jaguar, racing K1, old shape
  • Cougar = Lo vol K1 for the Ladeeez
  • C1, C2 = 1 and 2 man canoes, including Hi Kneeling kamikazee things
  • “Skinny” = New shape boats

Races

  • 10K = Weds time trial race, 3 laps of torture
  • 200M, 500M, 1000M = Sprint distances, raced at regattas
  • A to D = sprint divisions (A – C for women…who do things with fewer letters)
  • Vets = Animal doctors (and older paddlers, 35+)
  • Divisions = 1 – 9 covering marathon distances (4Km upwards), 1 = v good 9 = mostly juniors and medal hunters
  • Descent = as in “River Descent”, Liffey, Exe, Conway (ascent!) and lots of others in parts foreign; Douzie, Sella
  • DW = 125 mile Devizes to Westminster
  • Thameside = warm-up races for the DW, held on the Thames
  • Waterside = warm-up races for the DW, held on the…er….water
  • Hare and Hounds = Staggerd start to try get everyone to finish at the same time

Canoeing Technique

  • Big Plan = Sort of plan that is more statement of “desirable outcome” than “intent” but certainly involves a top three place in Mens B final at the Nationals next year tho might have to downgrade that to “Top three finish in anything”
  • Circuits = Tuesday nite torture run by Trish “Training for success” Davey
  • Power Circles = Sort of satanic rite thing, 5 pointed star and all that
  • Stroke Phase = Bit rude but can be helpful to analyse it
  • Hydodynamic lift = The buzz you get from falling in
  • Catch = as in “…I can’t catch those damn juniors…”
  • Winging = making it up
  • Rotation = Something to do with crops?
  • Draw stroke = Possibly illegal
  • Bow rudder = I thought the steering bit was at the other end?
  • Support stroke = Applause heard when someone falls in
  • High brace = A bit like High Tea without scones
  • Low brace = Back support for veterans
  • Slap support = Firm, open handed blow applied to hysterical paddler
  • Interval training = Tiring stuff, best avoided

Racing Terms

  • Le Mans Start = Have to run to your boat at the start. Sounds daft and probably is.
  • Monte Carlo starts = Bit like Le Mans start but more of a lottery
  • Wash hanging = considered cheating by those who can’t do it. Arrestable offence when sprint racing
  • Cheating = see “Wash Hanging”
  • Burn = Setting fire to competitors boats or, more accurately, “Burning” past them.
  • Regatta = Sprint racing, often in Nottingham, with a party on the Saturday nite
  • Marathon = Long distance stuff, generally no party